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Open Your Heart Chakra & Overcome the Fear of Intimacy

“Are you open to giving and receiving love?”

This is a question that’ll probably pop into your head at some point this month because Cupid season is here! And all-things-love is talk of the town.

But if you’re someone who runs a mile at the mere mention of a heart-to-heart chat, chances are, emotional intimacy is downright scary territory for you.

If you read this and went, “Oh no, that’s me!” here’s some food for thought:

Beneath the chocolates and pink overload of February lies a hard truth staring at us right in the face. Heart chakra intimacy and unconditional love form the very foundation of true connection, which is vital for our continued survival as a race (now, read that twice).

During the COVID-19 pandemic, the world witnessed an unprecedented global rise in depression and anxiety due to isolation and lack of connection.

Are you now convinced why healing your Heart chakra is the need of the hour? Today, let’s plunge into the deep scary waters of emotional intimacy and learn how to open your Heart chakra.

Heart Chakra Intimacy – What is it?

The Heart (Anahata) chakra is the fourth energy center in the 7-chakra system.

It governs our capacity for unconditional love, empathy, and compassion towards ourselves and others. Ruled by the air element, this is the only chakra that bridges both the physical and the non-physical.

The Heart chakra, when in good health, serves as a catalyst for spiritual ascension, transformation, and integration.

When out of alignment, its energy imbalance is reflected in our physical and mental health as anxiety, depression, weakened immune system, a sense of competition in our relationships, and a host of other symptoms.

If love opens the Heart chakra, what blocks it?

Full points to you if you said fear and not hate. Fear hinders the expansion of this chakra. It drives us to connect with others from a space of lack, insecurity, and selfish motives.

Fear makes us believe that we are not worthy of love, so we have to fight (manipulate, compete, people please, blame, self-sabotage, play-the-victim…the list-is-long!) our way to receive it.

However, our soul and Heart chakra push us to seek connection and emotional intimacy with no expectation of reciprocity.

Heart chakra intimacy asks us to elevate ourselves beyond fear and connect with no strings attached.

Why Are We Terrified of Emotional Intimacy?

hands holding a red heart

Okay, so we have fear! But why?

Vulnerability and showing up with zero layers can be a hit or miss! There’s a 50% probability that the person we let in will truly accept us for who we are!

Worst case scenario is that we open up ourselves to ridicule, rejection, and abandonment. Rejection poses a huge threat to the ego-driven mind. Clearly then, seeking a safe comfort zone in our interactions becomes a subconscious primary goal for the ego.

With every new social connection, we subconsciously ask, “how emotionally safe are we with this person?” .This “safety assessment phase” is filled with facades and fears. This has “bad news” for Heart chakra intimacy written all over it.

We ask that you throw out your safety net (a.k.a ego). Forget the fears and facades. Jump right in as your true self with every social connection you form.

In the words of Brene Brown:

“Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection”

So, today, which do you choose? Vulnerability or safety?

You might also want to check out: 10 Soothing Mantras for the Heart Chakra

3 Ways to Open Your Heart Chakra

1. Identify Subconscious Thought Patterns

We spoke of the ego and how it instills fear within our Heart chakra. As a first step, identifying the ego’s subconscious thought patterns can be hugely instrumental for becoming intimate with our own selves.

Here are a few journaling prompts to help you sift through your ego layer:

  • Why am I terrified to connect with others emotionally?
  • When I open up to a person and they judge me, so what? Why am I so afraid of being judged by others?
  • When in the recent past did I feel most hurt? Why? (state a reason which does not account for self-blame and/or blaming others).
  • How can I think differently about this event?
  • What have I learned about myself from this interaction?
  • How can I apply this lesson in future interactions to open my heart chakra?
  • If I am hurt again, what’s an effective way to communicate and effectively express myself? (plan ahead and up your communication game).

2. Practice Gratitude

We bet you heard “give thanks” a bunch, on and off social media.

Both ancient poets and today’s scientists have glorified the beneficial effects of practicing gratitude on the mind, body, and soul. And for a good reason!

Gratitude is an elevated emotion that sets you up to receive and give positive vibes. Practicing gratitude has been proven to promote energy flow through the heart center and activate this chakra.

3. Surround Yourself With Green

“Nature is medicine,” said Hippocrates.

Nature is abundantly green, which is also the color of the Heart chakra. What’s more, spending time in nature has been scientifically proven to impact our brains and bodies positively.

For the purposes of Heart chakra activation, intentionally and mindfully consuming green foods like broccoli, spinach, avocado, other leafy vegetables can be greatly beneficial.

As cliche as it sounds, “eating your greens” really does work!

Additionally, crystals such as rose quartz and jade can be used to modulate Heart chakra health.

In need of more green in your diet? Make sure to read: 3 Meals for Your Heart Chakra

Heal Your Heart Chakra Today

Opening your Heart chakra helps expand your personal consciousness. A sure shot way to get started is to begin feeling all your feelings.

“Feel so you can heal your Heart chakra” is a great mantra to start your day with. Unravel your true essence, live in harmony, and enrich your life by practicing Heart chakra intimacy.

Use this guided meditation as an added tool to help you open your Heart chakra!

Anu Sataluri

Anu Sataluri

Anu (short for Anupama) is a clinical researcher by profession. She worked in the healthcare industry for over 7 years, and was responsible for workflow management of clinical trials. During this period, she witnessed several hundred patients walk away in disappointment with "no cure" due to the "symptom-based" approach of Western... Read More

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