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A woman giving herself a hug while sitting on her couch.

How to Relieve Isolation Loneliness Based on Your Love Language

Not seeing the people we love is incredibly hard.

When all you want to do is hug your loved ones - or at the very least, see them in person - and you can’t, it’s only natural to feel alone. And it’s safe to say that the current situation in the world is testing everyone’s mental health and resilience.

In the movie P.S I Love You, Kathy Bates said, “Thing to remember is if we’re alone, we’re all together in that too.”

If that quote doesn’t bring you an ounce of comfort, that’s okay. As cliche as it’s becoming, it’s okay not to be okay. So, how can you relieve isolation loneliness? How do we navigate this tricky time where we might not be able to see anyone that we love in person?

Your love language says it all!

Let’s dive straight into how your love language and loneliness intersect and what actions you can take to feel a little less lonely during this turbulent time.

Not sure what your primary love language is? Take the Love Language Quiz before reading ahead!

Your Isolation Love Language Breakdown

In short, there are five love languages.

Each love language has weaknesses and strengths, many of which you can work with to make yourself feel a little less lonely. So let’s relieve isolation loneliness together. Using what makes us tick, we have the power to make ourselves feel that much better despite all that’s happening in the world right now.

Physical Touch

If this one scores high on your love language list, you aren’t alone. In other words, me too. I feel connected to those I care about through touch. In fact, growing up, my family was very much that kind of family that handed out hugs all the time.

And there’s a real scientific reason behind that comfort feeling you gain through physical touch.

Actions, like hugs, cause your brain to release oxytocin, the bonding hormone. It also reduces stress hormones, making you feel that much better, especially in tough times.

Now, I know this doesn’t work the same for everyone. But those of you that rely on physical touch as your main love language know exactly what I mean. Hugs and being physically being close to those you care about feels good.

You feel connected.

So, how can you cater to this love language loneliness without other people?

If you live alone, you’ll have to rely on yourself here. Don’t worry. You’ve got this.

Missing a hug? Hug yourself (I’m serious). Or grab a pillow and hug it instead. This can bring similar comfort (while not the same comfort) that a hug from a family member brings. Yes, it might sound silly but give it a try. It might just help even a little bit.

You can also try out self-massage.

Slowly provide deep strokes to part of your body using your hands or a self-massage tool. If you’re really feeling up for it, add in a bit of movement or yoga. Reconnect with your body and your own touch. For the time being, it’s something!

Learn more about this love language: Speaking the Love Languages: Physical Touch

Words of Affirmation

For the love language, words of affirmation, words speak louder than actions instead of the other way around. You love positive words that confirm, support, uplift, and reassure you. It’s how you know others care about you.

Luckily, this one isn’t too hard to fill.

Try reaching out to family members or close friends in your life, and book “encouragement calls.” These calls are centered around you both telling each other what you’ve done and where you’re at. And then, you cheer each other on and encourage one another.

At the same time, you might benefit from tuning out the news. Make room for more positive words in your life. Your love language indicates that you need it, especially right now.

Learn more about this love language: Speaking the Love Languages: Words of Affirmation

Quality Time

You need time to hang out and see the people you love and care about. Time matters the most to you. And with all this extra time that most people have, you can definitely schedule some quality time with friends and family in your calendar.

While you won’t get that in-person connection entirely, technology has made it easy to spend time with your loved ones, even if they are half a world away!

You can even have a sit-down meal with your friends or family through video. Or watch a movie together. Yes, it’s not the same. But it’s pretty close.

Ensure you give each other (your loved one, friend, or family member) the attention they deserve (unless you’re watching a movie) during this quality time and vice versa. It will fill you with all the feels and help you relieve isolation loneliness.

Learn more about this love language: Speaking the Love Languages: What is Quality Time?

Acts of Service

How can this love language reduce loneliness?

Well, mostly, it all comes down to supporting one another. And don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it, especially if your love language is acts of service.

You can even do this for yourself. Remember, the relationship and love you have with yourself are the most important. Draw a relaxing bubble bath for yourself. Or cook yourself your all-time favorite meal. Or set aside time with yourself to finally watch that movie or show you’ve wanted to watch.

Give yourself those acts of service!

If all else fails, don’t be scared to ask family or friends to fill that void. You could do the same for them!

Learn more about this love language: Speaking the Love Languages: Acts of Service

Receiving Gifts

If you’re big on receiving gifts as a way for others to show that they love you, show your appreciation when someone does this. Alternatively (we get it’s hard to ask for gifts - right?), buying locally online is like giving yourself a gift.

During tough times, treating yourself is absolutely allowed! In fact, we think you should.

You can also give gifts to those you love. Buy them an online Airbnb experience or an online meal prep box to put together (if they love cooking). Get creative. Spread the love!

Learn more about this love language: Speaking the Love Languages: Receiving Gifts

Combat Your Love Language Loneliness

Being away from the people and the things we love sucks. But you have it in you to make it better.

If you don’t live alone, communicating with your partner or those you live with what you need right now can also help in leaps and bounds. Sometimes, our partner doesn’t know what we need. You need to tell them and vice versa.

Start getting that love you deserve and start to deal with social distancing via your love languages!

Related article: The Myth of the In-Love Experience

Krista Bugden

Krista Bugden

"Believing in yourself is really half the battle," says Krista. Anything is possible and you really can achieve anything you set your mind to, is her motto. Physiotherapist, Piano player, skydiver, yogi, adventure traveler and energetic force of positivity, Krista is herself a (delightful) force to be reckoned with! As... Read More

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