5 Ways to Celebrate When Halloween Isn’t Your Thing
When sitting down to write this article I started having flashbacks of my college days where we made feeble attempts to boost our egos with scantily clad attire resembling some slightly offensive hyper-sexualized version of hard-working service professionals. I remember the 24 hours of mayhem to be less of a treat and more of a trick on myself. Participating in obligatory holiday self-destruction is something I had grown accustomed to and finally, after one too many bad hangovers, I realized I had a choice. I didn’t have to do it at all!
The first few years I skipped out on the gobblin-ing and goon-ing, my brain wasn’t used to breaking the norm. I was depressed and sat in bed. I didn’t have one creative idea of how to enjoy myself if I wasn’t doing what everyone else was doing. Over the years, I have gotten better at being happy and at finding the humour in the behaviours that humans partake in that really serve no functional or valuable purpose.
Here are some things I wish I had come up with years ago that can help you skip the candy bloat, pass on the wicked hangover, and keep your dignity intact (at least for tonight). You don’t have to be a Halloween basher and put others down for doing it, setting an example of independent thinking is a radical move in itself that is going to give you an unusual sense of satisfaction the more you do it. Say goodbye to waking up looking like a werewolf and feeling like your self-esteem is haunting you!
Stick It to the Tin Man! Here are 5 Fun Anti-Halloween Activities:
1. Use the holiday as a platform for some social justice work. First of all, the amount of plastic and garbage generated on Halloween is atrocious. Make a statement with a sign on your door that says, Halloween is killing the environment - #BoycottHalloween and get some attention. You could add information about how plastic and disposable packaging take advantage of a finite natural resource, killing the animals we are dressing up as and polluting the clean air and water we need to, you know, live. Have a conversation with anyone who comes to your door and meet your neighbours.
2. Cook a healthy meal and watch your favourite movie, Halloween-themed or otherwise. Make this a feel-good night for you instead of a feel-bad morning the next day. Making healthy decisions starts in the moments where everyone else gives in to the invitation from their friends or their current crush, and then the insanity ensues. You don’t need Mr. or Ms. Hottie to be happy, honey. You need someone who will love you beyond a sexy fake identity. Learn how to make decisions for yourself that will create happiness - don’t look for it in your social circle or partner.
3. Spend time reading or watching a documentary that will actually help you develop and learn something. Stay up late (or tuck yourself in early, it’s your night!), grab some popcorn, or eat peanut butter straight out of the jar. Expand your mind instead of spending $70 on an outfit you’ll never wear again. The more time you spend not participating in the mass hysteria of holidays like Halloween, the more independent and intelligent you’ll become. Save the money you’d spend on alcohol, food, and your cab home.
4. Troll your friends with witty puns on social media! For every person who posts a selfie or picture in their Halloween costume, use your brain to come up with a witty joke related to their costume without being insulting. This will keep you laughing and completely occupy your mind. You’ll be up all night and you’ll have a whole new list of puns to use at your disposal and impress your friends.
5. Do something creative with your feelings about how “obligatory” holiday participation affects people who mindlessly follow tradition. Draw, paint, write, make or play some music. See what comes out. You don’t have to spend a lot or any money on this, and you can get your friends involved if you want to. You can all use your art to inspire people to think more critically about the environment and our culture. Give yourself permission to use your voice and experiment in a way that is fun and creative. Do a performance art piece where you and your friends stuff money into a rotting pumpkin, portraying the ludicracy of throwing hard-earned money into dated traditions.
Breaking the Norm is Invigorating & Valuable
When you break the norm or swim upstream, so to speak, you’re showing people a way out of the maze of ill-health and mindless following of tradition. If you want to do something revolutionary, stop participating in holidays and self-destruction and start talking about how people are profiting off of the poor health of others based on deeply ingrained cultural traditions. Eventually, you’ll be a hero to someone. Someone is struggling with diabetes, someone is struggling with alcoholism, the ocean is full of trash, there are many reasons not to participate in unquestioned cultural-isms. Be proud of your choice, have fun let people wonder what it is that is making you smile this Halloween.
Need some more creative ideas? Check out Bustle’s article, 8 Alternate Things To Do If You Have No Interest In This Dumb Holiday.
Related Article: What Do Sober People Do For Fun?